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one of those nights

Do you ever have those nights where you just lie in bed all night, tossing and turning, unable to sleep, frustrated, waiting for the sun to come up so that you can justify leaving the bed? Or, in my case, waiting for the alarm to go off way before the sun comes up! One might think that such a sleepless night would be precipitated by having a lot on your mind. but such nights for me tend to be when I have NOTHING to dwell on. It has been about four years since I've had one of these nights and to sleep so little the night before second semester started was not particularly welcome.

I started the day off yesterday with quite a lot on my mind. Specifically what I said to Christy as I sat down at church was, "I feel like all the tenuous strings that hold my live together and give it the outward appearance of having everything together are about to snap with the least little impetus." I had quite the emotional whirlwind of a day, but by the time I went to bed my heart and my mind, at least on the conscious level, were at peace. And yet I could not sleep! I really cannot think of anything more frustrating (maybe the bureaucracy of the public school system) than lying in bed, exhausted, unable to sleep.

And so, I stumbled through the day today, praying for God's grace that I would not snap at the kids or be irritable with the silly things they do which normally amuse me. My prayers were answered with a smooth first day back, though I can hardly keep my eyes open now to type, and I will be going to bed very early tonight...

posted by CP @ 5:32 PM 1 thoughts